Deciding, It's A Mental Thing

This whole thing is becoming a mental exercise.  For years I have been reading about the Appalachian Trail and it began to take on a a mythic feel.  It was always something that someone else did, but was out of reach for the average person.  Granted most of these accounts are thru-hikes, where some desperate soul walks the 2000 plus miles in one long journey.  That remains out of reach for me,  I have serious doubts that I could maintain the mental stamina required to pull that off.  No matter the length, tackling any portion of the AT always seemed to be the domain of some other type of person.

Which is utter nonsense; every hiker I have met is an individual and to typecast any of them is a gross disservice.  I have no doubt I will run into everybody from elderly couples, to young college kids, to middle-aged businessmen, and everything in between.  There is no "type", but there is a common thread.  At some point each person made the decision to do it.

I can assume that the vast majority of people never even ask the question.  Of the remaining percentage, only a small percentage of them take that first step.  In that decision comes questions about fitness, mobility, means, availability, and other factors that come into play.  I am lucky in that I have the baseline fitness, financial means and availability to pull this off without having to make massive accommodations.  The biggest effort was making the commitment and that meant getting past the fear.  Yes, fear.  That coming from a person who spent 20 years as a firefighter, rides motorcycles, flies small planes and solo hikes.  So it was, and remains, more of a mental challenge than a physical one.   That no doubt will reverse when I get to my first day long uphill hike and my body runs out of steam -- but the experts would say that is mental too.  If I don't take on each day knowing I can do it, I am setting myself up to NOT be able to do it.  Self-fulfilling prophecy, or whatever you want to call it.

I have found the best way to conquer fear is to decide to tackle it head on.  At some point you just shrug and say "OK".  Bear in mind this is not bowel-quivering, adrenaline rush fear, no, this is more the nagging voice of self-doubt that accompanies this kind of adventure.  Can I walk for 14 miles on day 5?  Can I carry 10 pounds of food?  Will I be able to manage the heat or the cold?  Will I take a tumble and hurt myself?  Honestly I could go on and on with those nagging self doubts, but inevitably the answer is "yes".  I have years of camping and backpacking experience, top notch almost ultralight equipment, a great team of people I trust, and the gift of a body that has the capability to absorb a lot of punishment before it fights back.

The other way to conquer self-doubt is to prepare.  I have hiked longer and harder than ever before this past few months. Given three month's notice, I launched myself into this thing with great vigor and have noticed extreme benefits.  Hills that used to leave me gasping for air now barely raise my heart rate.  To date I have lost 37 pounds.  I feel confident yet not over-confident and though I am smart enough to listen to my inner voice of self-doubt, I am also prepped with a counter-argument and a plan.

This past weekend Laura and I tackled two different trails for a total of about 11 miles.  Squeezed in between other activities and the inevitable housework that accompanies the weekend, we did these miles in about 4 to 4.5 hours.  What made this significant was heat ... like much of the country, we were experiencing mid-90 degree days.  Despite that, we set a good pace and rolled through these hikes with no problem.  That gives me a good indication we are close to being ready to go.  I doubt we'll experience much hotter ... at least I hope not.  But at least now I can remind my inner voice of self-doubt that I already tackled two different high heat and humidity hikes and was not much the worse for wear. 

I promote this AT trip as a "life-changing event".  I have caught some heat for that, with suggestions that I wait and see what this trip means to me after it is over.  A few problems with that ... as a writer I need to keep my eye on the ball for the duration and that means capturing these events and thoughts as they occur.  That way if I come off the mountain a changed man I will have my notes in place already.  The really important thing, though, is that the actual trip is just a part of the journey.  The physical results I have already achieved are already life-changing.  Other things are changing, too. 

When you Reboot because Office stops working, well, everything else gets a fresh start too.  You can't truly Reboot without starting everything fresh.  You may not load the same programs ... you have the option to Select Adventure.  This blog is about a hiking trip, but Reboot, Select Adventure is about much more than a single trip.  It's about creating life-changing adventures and having the courage to look life in the eye and deciding to tackle it straight on. 

Notice the word choice:  Deciding.  It's a mental thing ... be it work, play, life, or love, everything starts with a decision.  An adventure like this where you push your boundaries and accomplish things that are way outside the norm gives you a great place to look at everything with a fresh perspective.  When I am done with this trip I will be one of those people who took on the AT, if only a portion.  I will have hiked a lot of miles, missed a lot of showers, slept in cars and tents and shelters, and ground my way on foot to a goal.  That is when the hard work begins ... taking the best of the old and combining it with the new and making sure that when this is done I didn't just Reboot but I also decide to hit Select Adventure every day.